A List of Things I Simply Do Not Understand

There are a lot of things in life I will never understand.  Why is the grass green, why is the sky blue, are you there, God? etc.

But then there are just simple things that literally make no sense to me.  I hear of these things, or I see something and I just, um, huh?

Throw Back Thursday on instragram. #tbt.  

You weren't that cute of a kid.  And just because it is Thursday doesn't mean you need to find an old picture and make it look even older and alternative.  Just post it when you find it, no need to save it 'til Thursday.

241543903.

Google it.  I'll wait.

Heads in Freezers?  Again, what the mother fuck?

The Harlem Shake.

WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK IS THIS?  Perhaps the most confusing.  I literally have no idea what this is, why it is cool, and where it came from.  I don't get it.  I don't want to get it.  Why??

Gun Nuts.

(sorry to get political on you.)

(No I'm not.)

(#sorryimnotsorry)

I hate the argument, "criminals will still use guns, so why make assault rifles illegal??"  Ok asshole, drug users still use drugs, kids still like to light up, alcoholics still like to drive home, and yet we make all of those things illegal to try to put a small dent in crime and accidents.  Why not do the same here?  Because your right trumps my safety?  Because you might need to revolt against Obama? Kindly fuck off and calm your tits.

The Twilight series.

No description necessary.

Selfies.

Am I the only one who constantly shies away from a camera whenever I see one?  Am I the only one who DREADS having their picture taken alone?  So awkward.  And even more awkward?  The way I look when I try to take a selfie.

SIDE NOTE: even more than the regular selfie, I do not get why so many women take selfies in the car. Is that the only place you are ever dressed up and have good lighting?  That cannot be correct.  Please stop, you are beautiful friends of mine, do not ruin your picture with an awful backdrop.

Hipsters.

They think they are so original.  I've got news for you, you trendy fucks, some of us were wearing glasses for years.  And flannel too.  It is not trendy, it is how we see and stay warm.