Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Bitches, I'm back

Sweet sassy molassy, I am done with my whirl-wind trip of America.  Seven cities visited in 3 weeks, and an equal number of pounds added to my waistline.  Thanks, airport food and all disregard for anything healthy.


I am back in the saddle and so looking forward to a couple of months without major travel.  Regular exercise, making my own meals, back on the double dub train, working from a desk, doing regularly grocery shopping, watching FNL with my man, washing load after load of laundry...it all sounds so appealing right now (please remind me of this when I complain about how boring my life is in 3 weeks).

Before I dive back in to my regular, boring, busy (for now) life, I thought I would share one last story of my travels with you.

The scene: Earls Bar, Denver, Colorado.  The cast of Characters: H. Keane and myself.

Here we are, sitting at our table near the bar, exhausted (please see: two all nighters in two weeks), ready to leave and hit the hay.  When the bartender walks over and says "Are you 21?  These men at the bar want to buy you some drinks."  I know, I was as shocked as you.  Me?  Greasy haired and all?  I was flattered, especially when the bartender said "Those men at the bar think you are the most beautiful women they have ever seen.  And I agree." (Again, seriously shocking. Even though it was a bold faced lie and an obviously desperate attempt to get laid.)  We agreed to the drinks and the bartender returned a moment later with...wait for it...two shots...of...BAILEYS.

Because nothing says "You are so hot, let me get in your pants" like an Irish whiskey and cream liqueur.

Off to resume my granny status,
Shaun John

4 comments:

  1. ah hahahah. Baileys is now a seductive shot? I will make a note of that.

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  2. holy crap it allowed me to post a comment. STOP THE EFFING PRESSES.

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  3. Too funny! Glad you are finally home. One time at a bar (and by bar I mean family restaurant with a bar) I was sitting with a friend at a table when the bartender came over and brought me a coaster. He said "the guys at the bar thought you needed a coaster for your beer". The coaster had two names and two numbers on it. When they came over to talk to me and found out I worked for Social Security, they asked for their coaster back. No joke!!!

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